The Inglorious Exploits of Dear Leader, Episode 3
Dear Leader issued a full-throated defense of his signature healthcare reform law today in the face of rising criticism from his detractors. He highlighted the $267 check Morgan Theriot of Silver Spring, Maryland received as a rebate from her insurer when her premiums were not spent according to Dear Leader’s 80/20 ratio of medical care to administrative costs. Dear Leader’s underlings highlighted total rebates in 2012 from the medical-loss ration provision of almost $500 million.
Other claims included total consumer savings of almost $4 billion, due to the aforementioned rebates and an estimated $3.4 billion in lower premiums. Dear Leader also highlighted New York’s estimates that premiums may fall by as much as 50% next year due to his Obamacare.
Haters of America Republicans in the House of Representatives voted for the 40th time to repeal Dear Leader’s Glorious Healthcare Reform Law, and they were joined by traitors to Dear Leader’s cause. Twenty-two of Dear Leader’s own Democrats voted to delay the individual mandate.
Dear Leader’s delay of the employer mandate went unmentioned at his press conference, as he highlighted the $267 check received by Morgan Theriot. Dear Leader also faced issues with the 12 year contract awarded to Serco Inc, a U.S. subsidiary of British company Serco Group Plc, which is under investigation by the British government for charging for services it did not provide at prisons in the United Kingdom.
Just 37% of the public believes the healthcare law is a good idea, despite Dear Leader’s protestations in the face of the 49% of Americans who believe the law is a bad idea. Dear Leader was strident in his condemnation of Republicans for “re-fighting these old battles,” and noted that the law was not about him, which was an unusual admission. Dear Leader noted that he already had “really good health care,” so he does not need Obamacare.
As Dear Leader promised, premiums will become drastically lower next year in New York, as the healthy are forced to subsidize New York’s existing insurance market full of individuals with pre-existing conditions. Even after the lowered premiums, New Yorkers will still pay rates three times higher than those found in California before Obamcare. Of course, this presumes that individuals will enter the health insurance exchanges in New York; this is an unwise assumption when you consider that it will be much cheaper to pay the fine for no coverage to the IRS than it will be to pay premiums in New York.
While New York City will see rates decrease by an average of 55 percent, eastern New York will see rate increases between 30 and 39 percent. Dear Leader attempted to highlight New York’s rate decreases as a success, but the fact that New York was already the most expensive state for health insurance, along with the New York Times’ inflation of average premiums from $695 to in excess of $1,000, only further reveals the dishonesty of his claims.
Dear Leader also faced the bankruptcy of Detroit, a city he pledged to assist in avoiding bankruptcy. Just as his rate decreases have been shown to be less than advertised, his bankruptcy pledge to Detroit has also been stripped bare. Instead of helping Detroit avoid bankruptcy, Dear Leader is now monitoring the situation in Detroit.
Dear Leader is not responsible for misunderstandings; he said help and meant that he would help by monitoring the situation, as opposed to helping avoid a bankruptcy. Your perception is not Dear Leader’s problem, any more than the 39% health insurance rate spikes in Eastern New York are Dear Leader’s problem. After all, this isn’t about him, because he already has pretty good health insurance.
Jay Batman is a graduate of the Texas Tech University School of Law, where he attained his J.D. in May 2013. He completed a B.A. in English with a minor in Political Science at the University of Montevallo in 2002. He is employed with Dustin Stockton Political Strategies, LLC, and presently resides in West Texas with his dog and co-author, Buddy Love